The sure way to barack’s heart
If you want the favor and goodness of the United States government, if you want all the muscle of the United States leaning your way, then I know one thing:
It’s good to be a gangsta
Want the boot of America on your neck? Want America to spit in your face? Meddle with your internal politics, or worse, stand aside, hold coats as it were, as your government represses and murders your freedom-loving people?
While the American people have lately made it their full time job to stop Barack’s agenda of destroying the economy, he’s been merrily pooping in America’s own foreign policy nest. The boy wonder is nothing if not consistent. Let’s play a game. See if you can detect a pattern:
- Great Britain — (best ally America ever had, fought side by side in WW1, WW2, Cold War, both Gulf Wars) Hey, take your bust of Churchill and shove it. Oh, and here’s some White House gift shop DVDs that don’t work. But wait, there’s more! An iPod full of my speeches! And did I mention that France (inventor of the international “touchdown” sign) is the new best friend we never knew we had?
- China — (what is it now, 50 million dead? Tiananmen Square, repressive communist dictatorship, scandalous polluter, epic-scale industrial espionage, military expansionism on the Pacific Rim) [bowing] Brother, what would it take to get you into this stack of American debt today?
- Israel — (second-best ally America ever had, sole free society in the heart of evil) Insulted BeBe at the White House, agitated against Israel building settlements on its own land, demanded Israel make (still more) concessions to Palestinians, opened diplomatic ties with Syria.
- Iran — (so crazy, and with nukes, even their Islamist neighbors are scared of them) Hey! Let’s discuss this, shall we? Have a smoke?
- Iranian freedom-voters — (courageously voted for freedom, then protested in the streets, only to be gunned down, beaten, and hauled off to prison) [doing his best Sgt Shultz] I hear nothing! I see nothing!
- Cuba — (repressive communist dictatorship, now a half-century old, driving the nation into unending poverty) Hey, let’s rumba! Any cameras handy?
- Honduras — (following their Constitution, threw out a president wanting to vote himself president-for-life) Barack ridiculed them, pressured them to accept the deposed president, and revoked visas for Honduran officials coming to the UN summit. They never buckled, to their credit.
- Mexico — (openly encourages illegal immigration into the U.S) Hey, how about a standing-O for Calderon as he insults Arizona on the House floor!
- Poland, Georgia — (both previously under Soviet domination, now strong democracies and American allies) Georgia, an invasion? Really? That’s not an invasion, that’s just a border dispute. Poland? What do you need missile defense for anyway? Isn’t that just an act of provocation?
- Russia — (communism was overthrown, only to be replaced by thugocracy as they have worked to reclaim their empire) Barack signs a new START treaty that only Jimmy Carter could love, Dems ratify it during Lame Duck huckstermania event.
I don’t know. I think there’s a pattern in there somewhere. Want American love and favor, at least from the Barack administration?
Be a gangsta.
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