You might be an Establishment Republican if…..

Ok, ladies and gentlemen. There seem to be a large number of Republicans, elected and otherwise, who either believe they are conservative and are stupid, or they are just cynically coopting the term for their benefit. Some hide under the cover of the conservative label when it is convenient, but others simply do not understand that their beliefs and opinions, their values and principles, are counter to the conservative movement, and are in fact counter-productive. They work for the enemy while drawing a paycheck from the good guys.

So here’s a quick and dirty little test. 25 questions. If you are a yes on 5 or more, you need check your drawers to see if you have the right equipment. If you get 8 or more, just go buy an Obama t-shirt and get out of here.

You might be an Establishment Republican if…..

  • your instant assessment of a Republican candidate is driven by electability
  • your instant assessment of a Republican candidate is driven by how much he/she appeals to moderates
  • your instant assessment of a Republican candidate is driven by how well he/she works with Democrats
  • your instant assessment of a Republican candidate is driven by how well they are treated by the media
  • your instant assessment of a Republican candidate is driven by what national Republican pundits think of him/her
  • your instant assessment of a Republican candidate is driven by what national elected Republicans think of him/her
  • your are instantly turned off if a Republican candidate proudly supports social conservatism
  • you are embarrassed by the Tea Party movement
  • you think the Tea parties are full of bumpkins who know much less than you do
  • you think it is important to hide conservative agendas in order to diminish negative media attention
  • you think higher earners don’t pay (at least) their fair share in taxes
  • you are not instantly revolted in your gut at the thought of enacting or voting for Cap & Trade
  • you would have made any deal to avoid a government shutdown back in March/April
  • you supported Specter over Toomey in 2004
  • you supported Crist in 2010 before Rubio started beating him like a rented mule in the polls
  • you thought Vitter should resign
  • you do not hold it against Santorum that he endorsed Specter over Toomey in 2004
  • you cringed when President George W Bush nominated Sam Alito to the Supreme Court
  • McCain was one of your top three picks in the 2008 primaries
  • when a new poll comes out that shows Barack approval numbers way up, or shows that most Americans are in favor of BambiCare, trial lawyers, and shutting down churches, your first thought is “oh no” [you are NOT an Establishment Republican if your first thought is “uh huh, show me the raw sampling data and the questions”]
  • you believe it is hopeless to directly challenge the lefty bias of the press
  • you think it is important to play fair in the same venue where the Democrats shamelessly and blatantly cheat
  • you think the only effective counter to Democrats stealing close elections involves beating them by a larger margin
  • you don’t believe Republicans should filibuster to block despicable, crooked nominees
  • you believe that Democrats are not evil, just wrong

OK, how did you do?

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